Sunday, October 02, 2005

Rusty "Rush" Limbaugh in a panic - How is he to save so many dark souls and keep himself out of prison by August Keso

The air crackled and snapped with Rusty "Rush" Hudson Limbaugh the Third's angst and panic. His listening audience, were they honest with themselves, and they rarely are, could have felt Rusty's heart racing, veins in neck and face bulging threatening an aneurism or worse, a full blown stroke. With very little imagination, if any at all, the rapt listeners could have felt the portly propagandist's lips quiver, like a spoiled child whose favorite toy had been unceremoniously taken from him. They could have envisioned even within their own limited minds, the angry spittle shooting out from Limbaugh's rabid and foul mouth, landing with a vicious splat upon his Rove inspired daily talking points spread out on sheets of paper before him, and lathering his microphone. Rusty Limbaugh, America's self-appointed professor of morality and values, aside from his own drug related legal problems, has found himself having to defend the indefensible. Rusty, has had to try and convince America, that his stygian soul and that of nearly every Republican from Bush, DeLay, Bennett and Frist; to gay hating gay mayors in Washington State, aren't the dark souls warned would be concealed by the anti-Christ himself -- as one might recall, is to present itself as the Great Moral Savior, when in fact the anti-Christ is evil personified -- but are indeed, never you mind what your own eyes might see and ears might hear, the mere victims of the powerless and inept Left.These are hard times for Rusty Limbaugh, and the many Republican propagandists, like FOX "We just won't report anything about Frist, DeLay, Bennett or Bush" News. In light of DeLay's indictment and Frist's insider stock trading, FOX has literally taken to scouring the globe in search of missing white American women. They've reported wildfires, missing women, how big oil raking working people over the coals, i.e., price gouging gasoline, is good for the economy ("Don't be a victim, invest the money you haven't got into big oil and reap the rewards," Stein insisted during a segment of Cavuto). Ah, but for Rusty, life is so much more complicated.Rusty doesn't get paid, for ignoring the news. Rusty's job is to transform reality into a new and improved Republican misinformed, manipulated and twisted pseudo-reality. Rusty, while FOX simply hides from the news, must confront the evil deeds of the "Morals and Values" Republican Party, and find a way...someway...anyway...to make the legion of anti-Christ appear pure and pristine, as newly fallen snow. Oh! Such venom, hatred and rage Rusty did display while defending Bennett's, accurately paraphrasing here, remarks, "No doubt, if you want to lower the crime rate, just abort all the black babies and crime will decrease... ." Surely, Rusty's thick head, and nicotine stained fingers must have been shaking with a blinding white-hot anger that had consumed him, as he muddled and struggled to pin the gambling addicted morally superior Bennett's vile words -- somehow, had to be a way -- on the, to Rusty's way of thinking, ultra evil Left; because Rusty knows, and his listeners do too, NOTHING is EVER the fault of Republicans. It is ALWAYS, though it is the Republican Dark Lords themselves doing the deeds, a conspiracy contrived by the evil Left!Yet, today, thanks to the dark Lords ruling the Republican Party, this is what Rusty "El-Rushbo" Limbaugh, is left to work with. How can even the most excellent imitation of Goebbels, be expected to spin George "Bungling" Bush's Katrina and Rita response into gold? How is Rusty supposed to make Frist's insider stock trading appear anything, but corrupt when the fool Frist, has all ready lied on national television (January, 2003) and claimed it would be illegal, for him to know ANYTHING about his blind trust...only to, all along, be made well aware of EVERYTHING about said trust? For the love of God (or, Rusty being from the South, is that Gawd) how can anyone expect Limbaugh to save DeLay, when DeLay's own defense goes something like this:"Look, this indictment is the greatest miscarriage of justice in the history of this nation. Sure, I was reprimanded for the first time in 1993, for ethical violations. Then, a bit later, accused of racketeering...then still later, several more ethical violations and finally, now, an indictment for political campaign finance money laundering... "No wonder Rusty Limbaugh is fit to be tied! How is he, a mere mortal, to be expected to save the political souls of so many Dark Lords, when Jesus himself couldn't possibly succeed? Who can blame Limbaugh, for being so enraged...consumed by the white-hot flames of his hatred, for all things good and decent? These are indeed very difficult times for Rush, and to top it all off, he has to try and keep himself from going to prison. Who, in Rusty's shoes, wouldn't be riddled with angst and panic?

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